Sunday, March 27, 2011

About A Girl's SuperPowers

As I read through blogs I notice a common theme with female authors. The writers with XX chromosomes seem to vacillate between supreme confidence detailing their "superpowers" of mothering, sexiness, or persuasion or vast insecurity due to questions about vanity and their place in the world.

I write a lot about living with 4 women; my wife and 3 daughters. When you count my niece, who stays with us often, my sister in law, mother in law, and couple of female friends; I am usually the only dude in the room of many women. This makes me a keen observer of female characteristics. I'm not close to an expert. I still know little about women, but what I do know, can help a few of you who read this.

An actual superhero with pronounced powers, Wonder Woman, is who many women refer themselves as when describing what they do and what they are.

For the record, the latest incarnation of Wonder Woman, is Adrianne Palicki.

I have no idea what the new television series will do for the character of Diana Prince/wonder woman or how it will affect our culture. I do know this, the wonder women I live with have powers and they are aware of their abilities.

This weekend my six year old, previously blogged about as The Goose,

went into her older sister, 15 year old Tay's room to beg for a switch of rooms. Tay, without hesitating or allowing Goose to plead her case, said no, and shut her door. Goose bounded down the stairs, and shouted to her mom and I "i went into Tay's room, asked her to give me her room and she said no. I was sweet, gave her my puppy dog eyes, and she she still said no, I used all my powers!". The comedy of the story is overshadowed by the reality that Goose, at only 6 years old, is so aware of her "powers". My other two daughters are confident in their wiles. Tay knows how to talk in a sweet tone,

Bug knows how to show me affection,

and their mom, Bobina, knows how to play my emotions so that everyone gets what they need and want. This doesn;t make them manipulative, this makes them talented, real talented.

Where all of this comes off the rails is when women, especially the ones I live with, let their powers become power. Men are simple, even weird, anxiety ridden, robot like, men like your blogger. We want to feel needed, wanted, desired, loved, and necessary. But manipulate us, mistreat us, and we'll run the other way. We need to feel dominant and in control sometimes. How I love these women I'm with, is they know what buttons to push, and what buttons not to. In return they get my unconditional love and care.

If women really want to be confident in their arsenal of female weapons, they should know how treat the men in their lives in conjunction with their use of powers.

My girls can fight, have their own lasso of truth, and if I made millions, would fly around in an invisible Jet. As smart, funny, and beautiful as they are, they are very much Wonder Women. They are also vulnerable and kind to need to me to be their protector. The most telling thing is they take their cues from their mother. you know you've found the right person when she can combine being a strong willed badass with tenderness. Bobina's greatest superpower is applying that combination on a daily basis.

One of these days, a writer of comic books, movies, and television will recognize that having a female hero kick butt and be loving is a lot more appealing than one or the other. Maybe they should hang out at my house for a day or two.

I have to go now, my girls are using their powers to get ice cream.

Today's song is my favorite song on Nirvana's first record, Bleach, in 1989. Kurt Cobain wrote it about being a bad boyfriend to his then girlfriend, Tracy. I have always taken the song to mean what an immature guy is looking for in a female companion. I am around so many girls that the song's sweetness affects me. Here's Nirvana's About A Girl....


  1. great post - women are a great mystery to men and maybe the other way around too but I won't know.

    My song pick for this subject - "She's Always A Woman To Me", Billy Joel

  2. This is why I am not feminist. This is also why I have very few female friends, but I think I might like your Bobina and besides someone has to kill the spiders because I sure as hell am not going to. That's Jigger's job.

  3. You are smarter than the average bear for sure sir. Good for you for both respecting the powers and having them be accountable for using those powers for good instead of evil. Love this post and this song choice!

  4. Women scare me. I scare myself. Me and Freud could have had sleepovers, ordered pizza, braided each others hair, and dissected the female species for DAYS.

  5. While all this is true ... I married a strong woman and work with a number of them ... I have to tell you this.

    It takes a pretty strong man to live with strong women.

    It makes me feel better when the powers are unveiled.

  6. How sweet is this post?

    I have a feeling your girls are going to grow up to be strong, bad ass women who don't take shit from anyone!


  7. I grew up in a family of all women. There were two cousins out of about 10 total women, I know exactly where you are coming from.

  8. I mentioned on Twitter that blogger ate my first comment (I hate you Blogger and yet I stay with you!), but it was basically saying that I again thank you for raising the next gen of kickass females, especially of the stellar quality to temper their kickassity with a kind heart.

    I ADORE how your daughter is wearing a KISS shirt.~ I got an AC/DC one for my niece.

  9. Awesome song. I have a feeling that we children of the 80's/90's will still be listening to that album when we're old and gray.

  10. I will never understand women--or men, for that matter. Humans are weird. However, gender aside, I do understand great writing and a cool dad/husband.

    You also get bonus points for the fact that Fight Club is one of my favorite movies. Great post ;)